"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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