I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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