I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
