This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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