How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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