do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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