You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize
