I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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