just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
