Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
