before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
