Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
tell me about the eggs
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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