I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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