Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Randomize
