woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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