there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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