I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
