Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
