If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
