I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
