you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
