i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
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