I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
My liver just broke up with me...
her vagine was all disorganized.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
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