I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
