You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Randomize
