yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
