I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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