I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
