Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
