Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
