Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
