i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Randomize