so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize
