Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
