Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
