Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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