I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
