Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
