no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
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