You work out of a Hotel?
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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