moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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