Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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