Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
So here I am, sexting at work.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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