You just made me feel so damn special
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
