she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I know her cup size but not her name....
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
