I think i peed on brittanys purse
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
