i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
