Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I would fuck him just for his dog
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
