I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
vagina is talking i cant
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Randomize