I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
